5 Minute Read

Author: Megan Hayward, The Menopause Concierge®

Because a little understanding, positive energy and a willingness to do things differently can change everything.

Menopause might be happening in her body, but that does not mean she has to navigate it alone.

And while we all experience this natural biological transition differently, one thing is universal: having the right people around us can make an enormous difference.

Whether you are a partner, family member, friend, colleague or manager, there are so many ways you can make someone’s menopause experience a more positive one.

And no, you do not need to become a menopause expert! Although, if you would like to please let me know.

At Mimi Moon Meno, my philosophy is simple:

Movement. Mindset. Modify. ®

Move towards understanding. Surround yourself with positivity. And have the courage to change the things within your control.

Here are my five things that can really help.

1. GET CURIOUS, NOT CRITICAL.

Movement | Move towards understanding.

The first thing I encourage everyone to do is get curious!

Because menopause is about so much more than hot flushes, and some of the biggest changes are happening in places you cannot see.

Our brains, bones, muscles, metabolism, cardiovascular health and mental wellbeing are all part of the picture.

So instead of making assumptions about someone’s weight, energy, mood or behaviour, take an interest in what is actually happening.

For example, let’s talk about food.

If she is gaining weight, automatically suggesting she eat less or exercise more might not be particularly helpful.

During midlife, changes in muscle mass, sleep, activity, hormonal health and body composition mean we need to think about how we are fuelling our bodies.

Rather than jumping straight to reducing calories, get curious about protein, strength, fibre, calcium and the nutrients that support muscle, bones and long-term health.

Cook nutritious meals together. Explore new recipes. Make eating well something you both benefit from.

And when it comes to exercise, think less about burning calories and more about building strength and protecting the body you are taking forward.

A few ways to get curious:

• Learn about the less-recognised symptoms, including brain fog, migraine, joint pain, sleep disruption and anxiety.
• Understand the importance of strength training, weight-bearing exercise, good nutrition and recovery.
• Ask questions rather than making assumptions about someone’s mood, confidence, energy or changing needs.
• At work, learn how symptoms might interact with early starts, PPE, temperature, travel, deadlines or safety-critical tasks.
• Remember that not everything happening in midlife is menopause, so do not automatically attribute every change to hormones.

Try asking: “I have been learning a bit more about menopause. Is there anything you are experiencing that I could better understand?”

A little knowledge can replace a lot of misunderstanding.

2. LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND, NOT TO FIX.

Mindset | Create space for an honest conversation.

Sometimes the most supportive thing you can do is simply listen.

Not interrupt. Not minimise.

And not immediately jump in with what you think someone should do.

Because when someone is struggling with their sleep, confidence, mental health, physical symptoms or sense of self, they do not necessarily need another person giving them a list of things to fix.

They might just need to feel heard.

And please, let’s retire the phrase “It’s just your hormones.”

Hormones may be part of the explanation, but they are not a reason to dismiss someone’s experience.

Equally, understanding menopause does not mean excusing hurtful behaviour. We all have a responsibility to treat the people around us with respect.

This is about creating compassion on both sides.

A few things that help:

• Ask whether they want you to listen or help explore possible solutions.
• Do not take every emotional change personally, but do not ignore problems in the relationship either.
• Keep conversations open around intimacy, affection and connection. Changes in libido, comfort or confidence should never become a source of pressure or blame.
• Respect privacy. At work, no one should feel obliged to share intimate health details to be treated with dignity.
• Do not make jokes about menopause, age or someone’s ability to do their job.

Try asking: “Would you like me to listen, or would it help if we worked out what to do next together?”

And remember, sometimes someone does not know what they need yet.

That is 100% OK too.

Understanding is not about having all the answers. It is about making someone feel safe enough to have the conversation.

3. BE PART OF THEIR POSITIVE ENERGY.

Movement + Mindset | Help create a life that feels good.

If there is one thing I believe wholeheartedly, it is that the people, environments and energy we surround ourselves with make a difference.

And during menopause, when sleep, stress, anxiety, fatigue and confidence can all be affected, positivity becomes even more important.

But I do not mean pretending everything is wonderful when it is not.

Positivity is not about ignoring the hard stuff. It is about intentionally making room for the things that make life better.

And this is where Movement. Mindset. Modify. ® really comes together.

Move together.

Go for a sunrise walk. Take the dog out. Go swimming. Try yoga, Pilates, dancing or a strength class.

Find something you both enjoy, at a pace and level that suits you.

Sometimes five or fifteen minutes is a wonderful place to start.

Make room for joy.

Have a laugh. Spend time with friends. Plan something to look forward to. Put on your favourite music. Reconnect with the things that make you feel like you.

And please, do not underestimate how important it is to have some fun!

Protect rest and recovery.

Sleep is not a luxury.

If someone has spent the night awake with insomnia, night sweats or anxiety, they may not have the same energy or concentration the following day.

Be flexible. Make room for recovery. Share responsibilities so rest is actually possible.

Support the things that fill their cup.

That might be meditation, gardening, reading, mindfulness, gratitude, time outdoors, a hobby or simply having some uninterrupted time to themselves.

At work, positive energy can be created through supportive colleagues, respectful conversations, flexibility, genuine inclusion and recognising people’s contributions.

Try asking: “What could we do together this week that would make us both feel good?”

The aim is not to add another thing to an already overwhelming to-do list.

It is to create more opportunities for connection, movement, laughter and wellbeing.

Because life should be about more than simply getting through the day.

4. MAKE THE LITTLE THINGS EASIER.

Modify | Make a plan. Share the load. Work as a team.

This is a BIG one.

And I think it is one of the most practical ways to make a real difference.

For many women, menopause arrives at a time when they are already juggling careers, children, ageing parents, relationships, finances and the never-ending demands of everyday life.

Then throw disrupted sleep, fatigue, brain fog, anxiety or physical symptoms into the mix.

Something has to give.

And it should not automatically be her health, career, friendships or the things she loves doing.

So rather than simply offering to ‘help out’ occasionally, why not sit down together and make a plan?

At home: operate as a team.

Who does the shopping?

Who plans the meals? Who cooks them?

Who keeps track of school activities, medical appointments, bills, birthdays, household maintenance and everything else that keeps a home running?

And importantly, who is doing all the thinking, planning and remembering?

Because sharing the load is not just about doing the dishes when asked.

It is about taking genuine ownership and responsibility.

• Divide household responsibilities fairly and review them regularly.
• Make a weekly plan for meals, shopping, appointments and family commitments.
• Share the mental load, not just the physical tasks.
• Make sure everyone has time for movement, sleep, recovery, friendships and personal interests.
• Create routines that work for the whole household, rather than relying on one person to keep everything together.

At work: make practical adjustments.

Not everyone needs an adjustment, but for those who do, small changes can make an enormous difference.

That might mean flexibility after a sleepless night, better temperature control, appropriate PPE, access to toilets, period products and water, protected breaks or reviewing how work is scheduled.

And managers, remember that supporting performance is not about lowering expectations.

It is about creating the conditions that allow people to do their best work. You want to make work, work better.

For yourself: rethink the rules.

Sometimes Modify means introducing something new.

Sometimes it means doing less.

Sometimes it means establishing a boundary, asking for support or letting go of something that is no longer serving you.

Try asking: “What’s one thing we could change that would make today 10% easier?”

Then agree on a small change, give it a go and see whether it helps.

Little modifications can make a BIG difference, especially when everyone takes responsibility for making them work.

5. KEEP MOVING FORWARD TOGETHER.

Movement. Mindset. Modify. ® | Stay curious, keep learning and find what works.

Menopause isn’t a single moment or a one-size-fits-all experience.

Things change. Symptoms change. Life changes.

And what helps today might not be what someone needs six months from now.

That is why ongoing support is so important.

Encourage good healthcare.

If symptoms are affecting someone’s life, encourage them to speak with a knowledgeable health professional.

There are evidence-based medical options, including menopausal hormone therapy (MHT/HRT) where appropriate, non-hormonal treatments, complimentary medicine, psychological support and strategies for specific symptoms.

There is no single solution for everyone.

Offer to help prepare questions for an appointment, go along if invited, or simply make sure they have the time and space to seek care.

Keep learning together.

Understand the importance of brain, bone, heart and muscle health through midlife and beyond. This applies to everyone in the household or friendship group.  

Talk about sleep, nutrition, movement, mental wellbeing, health checks and long-term health, not just symptom management.

Keep checking in.

A conversation today should not be the last conversation.

At home, review what is working and what needs to change.

At work, make sure adjustments are useful, respectful and regularly reviewed, without compromising privacy or career opportunities.

And for women navigating their own menopause experience, remember that asking for support, trying new things and changing direction are signs of courage, resilience and taking control of what you can.

Try asking: “What’s working well for you at the moment, and is there anything we should do differently?”

The goal is not to get someone ‘back to normal’.

It is to help them feel healthy, supported, confident and positively charged as they move into the next stage of life.

ONE LAST THING…

You do not have to experience menopause to positively influence someone’s experience of it.

You do not have to get everything right.

You do not have to have all the answers.

And you certainly do not need to try to fix someone who is not broken.

But you can get curious.

You can listen.

You can bring positive energy.

You can share the load.

And you can be willing to do things differently.

Whether that is making breakfast, learning about muscle and bone health, taking responsibility at home, supporting a colleague or having a conversation you have been putting off.

Small actions. Positive changes. Better outcomes for everyone.

So, here is my challenge to you:

What is ONE thing you could do differently today to make someone’s life 10% easier?

Movement. Mindset. Modify. ®

Mimi Moon Meno
The Menopause Concierge®

This guide is educational and is not a substitute for personalised medical advice. New, persistent or concerning symptoms should be assessed by a qualified health professional.